Dissecting Smooth Criminal by Michael Jackson

As He Came Into The Window
It Was The Sound Of A
Crescendo - Which translated literally means 'As he came into the window you could hear glass breaking'
He Came Into Her Apartment
He Left The Bloodstains On
The Carpet - Left bloodstains on the carpet?? Doesn't sound like much of a smooth criminal to me. Not only is he noisy in the smashing of the window, he's left his DNA all over the carpet.
She Ran Underneath The Table - ok.....Why?
He Could See She Was Unable - Unable to what? find somewhere decent to hide maybe
So She Ran Into The Bedroom - Again, slightly better than under the table, but possibly not as good as running out the front door.
She Was Struck Down, It Was
Her Doom - So just to briefly recap: The 'smooth' crimal (and i use the term very loosely) has smashed his way into this girls apartment, cut himself badly on the glass, chased this girl from under the table and into her bedroom and then bludgeoned her to death.

Annie Are You Ok - She's not moving Michael
So, Annie Are You Ok  - Still not moving my friend
Are You Ok, Annie - Maybe you should check her pulse
Annie Are You Ok - Stop asking, check her pulse
So, Annie Are You Ok - She's not answering dammit, check her pulse
Are You Ok, Annie - For the love of god.....
Annie Are You Ok - Michael she's clearly not 'ok'
So, Annie Are You Ok - look at the smashed window, the blood on the carpet and the unconscious bleeding woman Michael - CALL AN AMBULANCE
Are You Ok, Annie - Are you thick or what??
Annie Are You Ok - Michael an ambulance quick before she bleeds to death
So, Annie Are You Ok, Are You Ok, Annie - No matter how many times you ask, SHE IS CLEARLY NOT 'OK'........OK??

(Annie Are You Ok) - (for petes sake)
(Will You Tell Us That You're
Ok) - erm, how? she's unconscious you dolt!
(There's A Sign In The
Window) - He left a sign in the window? - a criminal mastermind
(That He Struck You like a Shindu, Annie) - There is no such word as 'shindu' Michael. The closest meaning i could find is: The word Hindu: from Shindu, an Aryan term referring to anyone who lived beyond the grave. So what are you on about?
(He Came Into Your
Apartment) - yes, yes he did
(He Left The Bloodstains On
The Carpet) - good, yes...you're working it out
(Then You Ran Into The
Bedroom) - After hiding under the table, but ok. Good detective work Michael
(You Were Struck Down) - YES SHE WAS
(It Was Your Doom) - Now you're getting it!!

Annie Are You Ok - NOOOO
So, Annie Are You Ok - You know she's not ok
Are You Ok Annie - You said it yourself but a moment ago
Annie Are You Ok - she was struck down
So, Annie Are You Ok - It was her doom remember??
Are You Ok Annie - STOP ASKING
Annie Are You Ok - She was struck down like a Shindu. (The word Hindu: from Shindu, an Aryan term referring to anyone who lived beyond the grave) 
So, Annie Are You Ok - Are you pschizo?
Are You Ok Annie - If you stand there too long asking, you'll get done for her murder
You've Been Hit By - ......yes
You've Been Struck By- - ....so if you know this, why keep asking if she's ok?
A Smooth Criminal - Debatable as to how smooth he is, what with the smashing of windows, the cutting himself and then leaving a handwriting sample by the window.

So They Came Into The
Outway - Ok, must have left a trail there of blood
It Was Sunday-What A Black
Day - Raining?
Mouth To Mouth Resus-
Citation - Finally, you've got the picture
Sounding Heartbeats- Got there in the end Michael
Intimidations - Who's being intimidated? I don't understand

Annie Are You Ok
So, Annie Are You Ok
Are You Ok Annie
Annie Are You Ok
So, Annie Are You Ok
Are You Ok Annie
Annie Are You Ok
So, Annie Are You Ok
Are You Ok Annie
Annie Are You Ok
So, Annie Are You Ok
Are You Ok Annie - AAAAAARRRGGGGHHHHH!

Okay, I Want Everybody To
Clear The Area Right Now! - Everybody being who? Michael standing over her ranting the same thing over and over again, or Annie who has concussion and shouldn't be moved.

Aaow! - Sympathy pains Mike?
(Annie Are You Ok)
I Don't Know! - Dont know much do ya Mike?
(Will You Tell Us, That
You're Ok) - Stop badgering her - she's dazed and confused
I Don't Know! - No....no you don't.
(There's A Sign In The
Window) - How smooth of that criminal
I Don't Know! - Yes you do, it's right there...you just said.
(That He Struck You-A
Crescendo Annie) - In musical notation, crescendo refers to a passage of music during which the volume gradually increases. Rendering that sentence quite pointless in my opinion.
I Don't Know! - You don't know the meaning of the word crescendo Michael
(He Came Into Your
Apartment)
I Don't Know! - established
(Left Bloodstains On The
Carpet) - established
I Don't Know Why Baby! - Either do we - did he steal something or just bleed all over the rug?
(Then You Ran Into The
Bedroom)
I Don't Know!
(You Were Struck Down)
(It Was Your Doom-Annie!) - Striking words of encouragement for a girl who's in shock
(Annie Are You Ok)
Dad Gone It-Baby! - come again?
(Will You Tell Us, That
You're Ok)
Dad Gone It-Baby! - No.....still don't understand
(There's A Sign In The
Window)
Dad Gone It-Baby! - WHAT DOES THAT MEAN???
(That He Struck You-A
Crescendo Annie)
Hoo! Hoo! - You are clearly disturbed Mikey boy
(He Came Into Your
Apartment)
Dad - What has Joe Jackson got to do with any of this?

Dissecting Beautiful by Christina Aguilera

Don't look at me... - A line stolen straight from Hellraiser - good start

Everyday is so wonderful - (especially if you're me, Christina Aguilera)
Then suddenly
It's hard to breathe - That'll be all the cocaine you shove up your nostrils at swanky showbiz bashes love
Now and then I get insecure - Paranoid from all the charlie
From all the pain - yes life really is a bitch for you isn't Christina
I'm so ashamed - of what? your trousers with the arse cut out?

I am beautiful - modest too
No matter what they say - They say you looked crap with the 10 foot afro
Words can't bring me down - (unless they're printed in the sun or the news of the world)
I am beautiful
In every single way - Dont brag now love
Yes words can't bring me down
So don't you bring me down today - Page 7: Christina in major hair disaster, fiasco scandal

To all your friends
You're delirious
So consumed
In all your doom - *sarcastic tone* Yes, that's why they hang around with me
Trying hard to fill the emptiness - What, now everyone that isn't you is an empty shell Christina?
The pieces gone
Left the puzzle undone
Is that the way it is - No it isn't, you patronising cow

You are beautiful
No matter what they say - No matter what who says? The only one insulting me here is you
Words can't bring you down - Thats not stopping you having a damn good go
Cause you are beautiful
In every single way
Yes words can't bring you down
So don't you bring me down today - Don't you DARE turn this around on me..........

No matter what we do
No matter what we say
We're the song inside the tune
Full of beautiful mistakes
And everywhere we go
The sun will always shine
And tomorrow we might awake on the other side - That's a bit morbid, you want everyone that isn't you to die?

Cause we are beautiful
No matter what they say - What YOU say
Yes words won't bring us down, no
We are beautiful in every single way
Yes words can't bring us down
So don't you bring me down today - bring you down with what? my ugliness?

The moral of beautiful by Christina Aguilera is that people who have listened to the real meaning behind the lyrics and understood have been found floating in the nearest canal after deciding life is no longer worth living.

Dissecting Richard III (translating Bill Shakespeare)

Now is the winter of our discontent - Its winter time, i fucking hate it
Made glorious summer by this sun of York; - ooh but the sun seems to be shining over York of all places
And all the clouds that lour'd upon our house
In the deep bosom of the ocean buried. - a fucking great tidal wave has gone and washed my house away AND there is clouds in the sky, cos it's winter
Now are our brows bound with victorious wreaths; - we're wearing hats made of twigs cos we're that hard
Our bruised arms hung up for monuments; - our weapons from the last battle make rather attractive ornaments for the lounge wall
Our stern alarums changed to merry meetings, - we weren't happy but we are now
Our dreadful marches to delightful measures. - we're not fighting anymore, we're in the pub getting pissed
Grim-visaged war hath smooth'd his wrinkled front; - The war is now over (you getting the pictre?)
And now, instead of mounting barded steeds - instead of getting on horses

To fright the souls of fearful adversaries, - and shitting up our enemies
He capers nimbly in a lady's chamber - he's sneaked into some birds bedroom
To the lascivious pleasing of a lute. - for a fuck
But I, that am not shaped for sportive tricks, - i have gout of the penis
Nor made to court an amorous looking-glass; - and i'm one ugly motherfucker
I, that am rudely stamp'd, and want love's majesty - I have a hump on my back, oh why wont anyone love me?
To strut before a wanton ambling nymph; - i want to fuck a blind nymphomaniac
I, that am curtail'd of this fair proportion, - i'm a short arse
Cheated of feature by dissembling nature, - with a hunchback
Deformed, unfinish'd, sent before my time - i am sooooo minging and was born prematurely
Into this breathing world, scarce half made up, -  wasnt ready to be born goddamit
And that so lamely and unfashionable- i have no tommy hilfiger in my wardrobe
That dogs bark at me as I halt by them; - even dogs notice what a munter i am
Why, I, in this weak piping time of peace, - why me?
Have no delight to pass away the time, - i have no-one to fuck
Unless to spy my shadow in the sun - but i do enjoy watching other people fuck
And descant on mine own deformity: - whilst i feel sorry for myself
And therefore, since I cannot prove a lover, - therefore, since i cant get laid
To entertain these fair well-spoken days, - and fuck all day
I am determined to prove a villain - i'm going to be a bit evil
And hate the idle pleasures of these days. - and ruin everyone elses love life
Plots have I laid, inductions dangerous,- i've been scheming
By drunken prophecies, libels and dreams, - even when pissed and asleep
To set my brother Clarence and the king - I'm gonna make my brother Clarence King
In deadly hate the one against the other: - i hate the current king
And if King Edward be as true and just - We'll see if King Edward's a nice bloke or not (even though he's named after a potato)
As I am subtle, false and treacherous,- i'm well cunning i am
This day should Clarence closely be mew'd up, -
About a prophecy, which says that 'G'
Of Edward's heirs the murderer shall be. - Eddie's gonna be murdered by someone starting with the initial G according to some clairvoyant
Dive, thoughts, down to my soul: here
Clarence comes. - Thats got me plotting - i really shouldnt be spying on my brother having sex..ooh he's just nailed that bitch

Basically Richard was an ugly deformed little shit who turned evil because he couldnt get a fuck

 

TOP OF PAGE